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Itapos;s amazing how worried I was before coming to the school and even the first few months of it. I was worried that I wouldnapos;t have any opportunities coming my way. That I would be struggling to find meaning and purpose through the film industry.
Well, I have been putting myself out there in some sense.
Iapos;ve been meeting people and they have given me great opportunities.
I think if you show your eagerness to learn and to help out any way possible, they will remember you and want to work with you.

I still need to work on some projects. Just to build my resume and show people the type of things I can do.

Let me list the things I have to look forward too:

1. My thesis. Hopefully I will have one to screen by the end of the year. Iapos;m hoping it will be my stop motion animation....AND or a live action one. <---this is ambitious.

2. My classmates thesis.
Iapos;m figuring out what I like to do on set and what makes me happy.
I was thinking the Art Department, but I donapos;t really like how we are treated on set. But I need to get over that.
I really like working with the camera, but I would need to know so much more so I can be confident and ready whenever the director and DP need anything. This whole learning experience on the sets is great

3. Internship at the directors bureau if they except my resume. I met luna at a stop motion screening and she told me that I could totally send her my resume and she sounded very sure I could get an internship. Weapos;ll see how that goes.

4. I met Darrell who is shooting a movie that he is going to star in. He seems nice and probably will be a new lasting friendship. He said I can work on his projects.

5. I guess Deirdreapos;s boss has his very own production company and she showed him my work. They are interested in collaborating with me. I havenapos;t spoken to him yet, but Itapos;s worth a try.

6. Iapos;m going to try to do more music videos for friends. One for the jordan and the other, maybe for audrey. If she doesnapos;t want me to direct, i can probably get experience on her set of her official music video.

7. I worked for america young, she is a stunt coordinator but has a lot of connections. She was pleased by work i did on her webisode. Maybe sheapos;ll call me whenever she needs me.

8. Even my dad had a connection. One of his co-workers got signed on to do one of their projects for national geographics. He gave her my card, maybe i can get some experience there.

iapos;ll do anything right now just to meet people and be surrounded by filmmaking.

i have a meeting with my career advisor. He can help me with getting on track and focused.

I must brain storm on projects i can do while i have the equipment and time
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Today, while processing mail for my current temp job, I found myself lost in the feeling of the legal stationary that I was opening. It was powder blue with a linen texture. Since stationary, especially of the textured kind, is so rare to get, I caught myself and came to out of my absorption after Iapos;d unconsciously been running my hands and fingers over the envelope, lost in the blue, for a minute or two.

I am always doing this with textures of all sorts. If I can touch it, to see, sense and know it with my hands, I always take a moment out of my day to enjoy the object. I do this with carvings, stone or concrete structures, and even paintings if I have permission to touch them. Practically anything textured Iapos;m compelled to touch.

The only thing I am able to pull myself away from touching are snakes and lizards, though the urge is still very compelling my nervousness outweighs this compulsion.

Perhaps this is a form of self hypnosis?
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